Thursday, April 2, 2009

Urgent Message To The Osbournes: Get The Fuck Off My TV!

Ozzy, Sharon, Jack and Kelly, get the fuck off my TV. I'm fucking serious. Listen, I know times are fucking hard. The economy is in the fucking toilet, and The Osbournes, like everybody else, got get a fucking pay check in way they fucking can. Yes, I was a fan of their fucking MTV show. I thought it was a fucking good social experiment, showing Ozzy as the fucking family man and Sharon as the fucking take-no-prisoners-ball-breaker Mom and head of the Osbourne entertainment empire. Jack and Kelly rounded out the fucking portrait of domestic bliss. They have a new fucking show, Osbournes: Reloaded. I have two questions: Why? and What the fuck is it trying to be? A fucking family variety show like the how The Carpenters and The Osmonds used to do but a little better. Fuck that! I'm fucking sick of the new adventures of Papa Ozzy or whatever the fuck this is. I want Ozzy-King-of-Fucking-Darkness-Biting-Heads-Off-Fucking-Bats! I have an idea for a new show: Throw Jack and Kelly back in fucking rehab or wherever the fuck they hang out during the day. Send SHARON! to the fucking spa for an extended visit. Put Ozzy on a fucking tour bus and only let him off to fucking sing. Now that's a fucking show I'd fucking enjoy!

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